When I first started dating my wife, I wanted to be with her all the time…I still do but when we were first dating, I wanted to know everything about her and 45 minutes wasn’t enough time.
When my daughters were first born, I didn’t want to leave them to go to work. I didn’t want to miss one precious moment.
So why am I content with 45 minutes a week with God?
Men, building a relationship, whether it’s with our girlfriends, wives, children or even the guys we choose to hang out with, 45 minutes a week with never cut it. And when it comes to spending time with God, a 45 minute church service once a week definitely won’t cut it. Maybe the answer is we are not serious about building a relationship with Him?
If we want to be godly men, following Christ’s example, we must do more than 45 minutes a week.
Jesus’ relationship with the Father was more than once a week, in Mark 1:35 and in Matt 14:23 it states that Jesus went alone and prayed, and in Luke 6:12, we read that Jesus spent the whole night praying.
I remember spending the whole night getting to know the girl I was to marry – I wanted to build the relationship to where I knew everything about her.
When was the last time we spent the night with God, getting to know Him better?
Church service is great, to be part of a community of believers coming together, but we need more than that if we are going to stand against the temptations of the evil one, the temptations of the world. Our relationship with God will never be a close one if we don’t invest the time!
Just as important as our relationship with God, our wives and our children is the relationship we have with other Christian men. I know it’s a hard thing for us to do – to reach out to another man; but trust me; it will be worth the effort. Having another man to share life with, to read God’s Word with, to share the struggles we men face on a daily basis can be the difference between living and just existing.
So how do you go about it?
Let’s tackle the God thing first. We never leave our house without our pants on, so why would we want to leave our house without first spending some time with God? It doesn’t have to be an hour; it can be as simple as a few minutes taking the time to read one scripture, as simple as saying thank you for the blessings, it can be just to sit quietly and listen for His Voice.
I am not talking about a habit, where we do things over and over and it becomes routine. I am talking about recognizing God for Who He is and making the effort to know Him better, but that means admitting we need Him in our life. If you want to go deeper, make a commitment to get up a little earlier and start a daily devotion where we focus on God first, get to learn from what others are saying and get more than 45 minutes of God in our week.
Now the hard part of reaching out to build lasting friendships with other godly men. The first step is admitting we could use a friend.
It can start as easy as asking one guy to join you for a cup of coffee, or to go to a game, even a fishing trip. We should be praying about God leading us to a man that we feel we want that friendship with. It could be an older man from our church; you know the other guys sitting there for the 45 minute service, looking around, not engaged…maybe they're looking for you to ask them to coffee.
All men struggle, whether we want to admit it or not. To have someone to talk with, or do a project car with, or go fishing with can make the difference.
So don’t let life be just 45 minutes…let life be a lifetime with God and other men.
-Tom Sember is the former men's ministry director for the New York District of the Assemblies of God. He currently is a men's ministry speaker and author and works closely with Mantour Ministries during our Mantour Conferences. He also publishes a daily devotional for men. To connect with Tom or to receive his daily devotional, email him at email@example.com