top of page
  • Writer's pictureJamie Holden

October 14

Let's Talk About Sex

It’s been over a decade since I started attending multiple men’s conferences every year. Years ago, it seemed like every men’s conference had a section where they talked about sexual purity. All the women working at the event had to leave the room while men got real and raw about sexual temptation, the need to obey Biblical standards in relationships, sexual addiction, and pornography. It was at EVERY EVENT.

This year, as we discussed what workshops to have at the Mantour Conferences, someone said, “It’s been a while since we had the obligatory sexual purity workshop.” That started me thinking, “It’s been a while since I’ve heard that topic talked about at any event.”

A few days later, I was listening to a podcast (Cooper Stuff—I highly recommend it) where they discussed how no one talks about sexual purity in the church anymore. Youth groups aren’t talking about it because they are afraid of offending a generation that believes anything goes. (Very different from when I grew up, and purity was discussed all the time.)

Too many pastors ignore the issue because they don’t want to offend those who attend, volunteer, and give to the church but are living sinful sexual lives.

And yes, men’s ministries have even cut back on talking about it. I can tell you from attending women’s events as my sister’s assistant that they hardly ever spoke about it in the first place.

Still, the Bible talks about sex A LOT.

Not worried about offending people, the Bible lays out very clear directives and boundaries for sex. Anything outside of those boundaries is sin and causes separation from God. The man or woman who wants to follow the Biblical standard must stay within these boundaries in their sexual life. Churches who want to see their people be sanctified, live holy lives that God can bless, and spend eternity with Jesus in Heaven should be talking about what the Bible says about sex.

Just in case you haven’t heard it before or need a reminder, here are some bullet points. They come from the New Testament, so no one can say they don’t apply today.

-The Bible says that God created sex to be enjoyed by one man and one woman within the marriage covenant. Anything else is sin. (Ephesians 5:31)

-The Bible says fornication (sex outside of marriage between unmarried people) is a sin. This includes living together before marriage. There’s no age limit or excuse. If you aren’t married, you shouldn’t be having sex. (1 Corinthians 6:18)

-The Bible says adultery (having sex with someone else’s marriage partner) is a sin. (Galatians 5:19)

-The Bible says homosexuality is a sin. (1 Timothy 1:10)

-The Bible says bestiality, orgies, and drunken debauchery are sins. (This would include getting drunk and having a one-night stand.) (1 Peter 4:3)

Many progressive Christians say, “Oh, but that’s just the Apostle Paul. He had a lot of hang-ups.”

First, not true! All of the Bible is God’s Word meant to be obeyed.

Second, Jesus didn’t just condemn sexual misconduct. Jesus said that even thinking about another person lustfully was a sin. (Matthew 5:27-28) He went beyond just actions and into our thought life. By this, we can see that any form of pornography, whether it be traditional hardcore pornography or the soft porn we see on tv and in movies that leads to lust, would also be a sin.

The Bible doesn’t play around with these things. It doesn’t wink at them and say, “Yeah, we know it’s wrong, but everyone is doing it anyway.”

Instead, the Bible is very clear.

1 Corinthians 6:9-10 states that those who commit these sins will not make it to Heaven.

1 Corinthians 5:11-13 says that if someone calls themselves a Christian and yet lives a sexually promiscuous lifestyle, the church shouldn’t ignore it. They should be confronted and told they need to change. If they reject the warning and refuse to repent, then the Christians were to stop allowing them to act like they were a “brother in Christ” until the person repented.

Later, when that person repented, they were welcomed back.

It sounds harsh, but the Bible doesn’t play with sexual sin. It’s a big deal.

It should be talked about so that people can know what the Bible says and choose to obey it. So they can be “sanctified.”

What if you are living a sexually impure lifestyle?


Repent and ask God to forgive you.

Then do whatever it takes to overcome this sin in your life and start living according to Biblical purity.

Take whatever steps are necessary to bring your sex life under the lordship of Christ and live as a legendary man of God.

Memory Verse: You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’  But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. (Matthew 4:27-28, ESV)

Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

4 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All


bottom of page